God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
by Garrison Keillor

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor

Related topics: Funny

Nothing you do for a child is ever wasted.
- Garrison Keillor

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor

Thank you, God, for this good life
and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
- Garrison Keillor

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Thank you for joining me on this journey we call life,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor

Talent is God-given; be humble.
Fame is man-given; be thankful.
Conceit is self-given; be careful.
- John Wooden

You may call God love, you may call God goodness.
But the best name for God is compassion.
- Meister Eckhart

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr (Serenity Prayer)

Mother is the name for God
in the lips and hearts of little children.
- William Makepeace Thackeray

Every child comes with the message
that God is not yet discouraged of man.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Where love is, there God is also.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

When the vast cathedral of our being
becomes a sanctuary for all creation,
we become the face of God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Prayer doesn't change God, but changes him who prays
- Soren Kierkegaard

To know God, watch a butterfly return to the same tree -
after a year and a thousand miles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If I am capable of grasping God objectively,
I do not believe, but precisely because
I cannot do this I must believe.
- Soren Kierkegaard

If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need
but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him?
- 1 John 3:17

From the solemn gloom of the temple
children run out to sit in the dust,
God watches them play and forgets the priest.
- Rabindranath Tagore

What you are is God's gift to you:
what you become is your gift to god.
- Anthony Dalla Villa

The function of prayer is not to influence God,
but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh, for the touch of a hand
and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank

Where there is unconditional love,
there is no room for unhappiness.
Whenever I look in the mirror today,
I will say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Man plans, God laughs
- Yiddish Proverb

I distrust those people who know so well
what God wants them to do,
because I notice it always coincides
with their own desires.
- Susan B. Anthony

We should take care not to make the intellect our god;
it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.
- Albert Einstein

Non-violence requires a double faith,
faith in God and also faith in man.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Know thyself, and thou shalt know the Universe and God.
- Pythagoras

God is, even though the whole world deny him.
Truth stands, even if there be no public support.
It is self-sustained.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman

I think wholeness is God's design for us;
and that often amounts to embracing contradictions.
- Bono

Each one prays to God according to his own light.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Whenever I look at a human face,
I say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are most like God when we forgive.
- Anonymous

When God closes a door, he opens a window.
- Anonymous

Friends are the siblings God never gave us.
- Mencius

The Two Great Lessons of Life: Choose Love & Trust God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A coincidence is a small miracle in which
God chooses to remain anonymous.
- Anonymous

The wise man in the storm prays God,
not for safety from danger,
but for deliverance from fear.
It is the storm within which endangers him,
not the storm without.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friends are God's apology for relations.
- Hugh Kingsmille

Healing does not mean going back to the way things were before,
but rather allowing what is now to move us closer to God.
- Ram Dass

In great contests, each party claims to act
in accordance with the will of God.
Both may be, and one must be wrong.
- Abraham Lincoln

Our "Rainbows and Butterflies" are the small miracles of our life -
the little things that are so easy to overlook,
yet so awe inspiring when we take a moment
to notice and to pay attention.
Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh,
for the touch of a hand and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You don't choose your family.
They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.
- Desmond Tutu

I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God
who is sending a love letter to the world.
- Mother Teresa

Infinite striving to be the best is man's duty;
it is its own reward.
Everything else is in God's hands.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

God doesn't require us to succeed;
He only requires that you try.
- Mother Teresa

God has given you one face, and you make yourself another.
- William Shakespeare

Friends are God's way of apologizing to us for our families.
- Anonymous

God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers.
- Jewish Proverb

Faith is not the belief that God will do what you want.
It is the belief that God will do what is right.
- Max Lucado

Whenever I look in the mirror,
I say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The meaning of our self is not to be found
in its separateness from God and others,
but in the ceaseless realization of yoga, of union.
- Rabindranath Tagore

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your mind.'
This is the first and greatest commandment.
And the second is like it:
'Love your neighbor as yourself.'
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
- Matthew 22:36-40

Our creator is the same and never changes
despite the names given Him by people here
and in all parts of the world.
Even if we gave Him no name at all,
He would still be there, within us,
waiting to give us good on this earth.
- George Washington Carver

Religion can be the enemy of God.
- Bono

You hold onto religion, you know,
rules, regulations, traditions.
I think what God is interested in
is people's hearts, and that's hard enough.
- Bono

I believe in God, only I spell it Nature.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Difficulties show men what they are.
In case of any difficulty,
remember that God has pitted you
against a rough antagonist
that you may be a conqueror,
and this cannot be without toil.
- Epictetus

Prayer is simply a two-way conversation between you and God.
- Billy Graham

God doesn't make junk.
- Anonymous

Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything beautiful,
for beauty is God's handwriting.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I try to give to the poor people for love
what the rich could get for money.
No, I wouldn't touch a leper for a thousand pounds;
yet I willingly cure him for the love of God.
- Mother Teresa

Let Go, Let God.
- Anonymous

Whenever God wakes in us, our thinking
becomes clear - nothing is missing.
- St. Thomas Aquinas

The highest revelation is that God is in every man.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I do not believe in the God of the theologians;
but that there is a Supreme Intelligence I do not doubt.
- Thomas Edison

Faith is a living and unshakable confidence,
a belief in the grace of God so assured that
a man would die a thousand deaths for its sake.
- Martin Luther

As your spirit soars throughout
the vast Cathedral of Your Being,
look now into the still waters
of the reflecting pool and behold the face of God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Preserve me, O God: for in thee do I put my trust.
- Psalm 16:1

Morality is of the highest importance -
but for us, not for God.
- Albert Einstein

Your worst days are never so bad
that you are beyond the reach of God's grace.
And your best days are never so good
that you are beyond the need of God's grace.
- Anonymous

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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie