Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
by Woody Allen

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Related topics: Funny Cynical Life Human-Nature Psychology

The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have,
instead of what you don't have.
- Woody Allen

Eighty percent of success is showing up.
- Woody Allen

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

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Thank you for joining me on this journey we call life,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
- Woody Allen

Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

I have a very pessimistic view of life.
You should know this about me if we're gonna go out.
You know, I - I feel that life is -
is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
Those are the two categories, you know.
The - the horrible would be like, um,
I don't know, terminal cases, you know,
and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life.
It's amazing to me. You know, and the miserable is everyone else.
That's - that's - so - so - when you go through life -
you should be thankful that you're miserable
because you're very lucky to be miserable.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists?
In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
- Woody Allen

There's nothing wrong with being afraid.
We were meant to be afraid.
- the Woody Allen movie Anything Else

You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories

I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

I'm awash in self-contempt!
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

You have to learn to push the guilt
under the rug and move on,
otherwise it overwhelms you.
- the Woody Allen movie Match Point

I have a very low threshold of death.
My doctor says I can't have bullets enter my body at any time.
- the Woody Allen movie Casino Royale

The lion and the calf shall lie down together,
but the calf won't get much sleep.
- Woody Allen

Money is better than poverty,
if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen

The food at this place is really terrible ...
and such small portions.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year
for cheating on my metaphysics final ...
I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
- Woody Allen

A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)

I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen

I'm going to go in the bathroom and scream.
I'll be out in a minute.
- the Woody Allen movie What's New Pussycat

The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is not supposed to be fair.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is a succession of lessons
which must be lived to be understood.
- Helen Keller

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is without meaning.
You bring the meaning to it.
The meaning of life is
whatever you ascribe it to be.
Being alive is the meaning.
- Joseph Campbell

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump

The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson

Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein

The life of inner peace,
being harmonious and without stress,
is the easiest type of existence.
- Norman Vincent Peale

Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.
We give our own meaning to time as to life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller

Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't Criticize, Condemn, Or Complain.
- Dale Carnegie

We all live with the objective of being happy;
our lives are all different and yet the same.
- Anne Frank

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The question is not what you look at, but what you see.
- Henry David Thoreau

The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where there is no accusation of "fault,"
there can be no anger.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences.
No one can eliminate prejudices -
just recognize them.
- Edward R. Murrow

He who takes medicine and neglects his diet
wastes the skill of his doctors.
- Chinese Proverb

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

There are no facts, only interpretations.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie

Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

He who has overcome his fears will truly be free.
- Aristotle

If you wait for opportunities to occur,
you will be one of the crowd.
- Edward de Bono

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

We don't see things as they are,
we see things as we are.
- Anais Nin

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to Dance in the Rain.
- Vivian Greene

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather

I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't Take Anything Personally.
Nothing others do is because of you.
- Miguel Angel Ruiz (don Miguel Ruiz)

A time for work, a time for play -
balance in all things.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The way I see it, if you want the rainbow,
you gotta put up with the rain.
- Dolly Parton

Unsolicited Advice Is Always Meddling.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie