I would never want to be a member of a group
by George Carlin

I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin

Related topics: Cynical

As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin

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Thank you for joining me on this journey we call life,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin

So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin

The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin

I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin

One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin

Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin

If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin

No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin

The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin

Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin

I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin

Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin

Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin

If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin

Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn't be done.
- Amelia Earhart

You are never too old to set another goal
or to dream a new dream.
- C. S. Lewis

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather

One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump

Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Our Joy comes from living our own lives simply -
never from demanding that others live simply -
or from ever making any demands whatsoever upon others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Hate is never conquered by hate,
Hate is only conquered by love.
- The Buddha

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard

Choose Inner Peace.
Nothing is worth losing your inner peace.
Take action as circumstances require,
but never surrender your inner peace.
Stop. Breathe deeply.
Close your eyes and breathe deeply again.
Then, and only then, take action -
from a peaceful heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Great men or men of great gifts
you shall easily find,
but symmetrical men never.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

So your father, or your mother,
never thought you were good enough - SO WHAT?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Never give up.
- Anonymous

There are those that look at things
the way they are, and ask "Why?"
I dream of things that never were, and ask "Why not?"
- Robert F. Kennedy paraphrase of George Bernard Shaw

There may be times when we are powerless
to prevent injustice, but there must never
be a time when we fail to protest.
- Elie Wiesel

Talk not of wasted affection;
affection never was wasted.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore

In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves.
The process never ends until we die.
And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I'm a slow walker, but I never walk backward.
- Abraham Lincoln

I never worry about action, but only about inaction.
- Winston Churchill

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some people stay for awhile,
and move our souls to dance.
They awaken us to a new understanding,
leave footprints on our hearts,
and we are never, ever the same.
- Flavia Weedn

Anyone who has never made a mistake,
has never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein

He who never made a mistake,
never made a discovery.
- Samuel Smiles

Until you'll willing to look foolish,
you'll never have the possibility of being great.
- Cher

Better late than never.
- Proverb

Never give in - never, never, never, never.
- Winston Churchill

Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
- William Shakespeare

Never let your sense of morals
get in the way of doing what's right.
- Isaac Asimov

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

The problems of the world cannot possibly
be solved by skeptics or cynics
whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities.
We need men who can dream of things that never were.
- John F. Kennedy

Never stop dreaming.
- Anonymous

Never bend your head. Always hold it high.
Look the world straight in the eye.
- Helen Keller

Know that you are never alone.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When we do the best that we can,
we never know what miracle is wrought in our life,
or in the life of another.
- Helen Keller

A mind that is stretched by a new experience
an never go back to its old dimensions.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Never be stopped by fear or self-pity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Do not anticipate trouble,
or worry about what may never happen.
Keep in the sunlight.
- Benjamin Franklin

Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman

Never mind what others do;
do better than yourself,
beat your own record from day to day,
and you are a success.
- William J. H. Boetcker

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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie