If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
by George Carlin

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin

Related topics: Cynical

As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin

Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin

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Thank you for joining me on this journey we call life,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin

The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin

I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin

I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin

One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin

I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin

So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin

Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin

The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin

No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin

If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin

Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin

If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin

Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin

Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin

This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare

The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson

You do not need anyone's permission to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

All our dreams can come true,
if we have the courage to pursue them.
- Walt Disney

The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where there is shouting, there is no true knowledge.
- Leonardo da Vinci

If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
- Oscar Wilde

I do not need anyone's permission to be my true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The true delight is in the finding out,
rather than in the knowing.
- Isaac Asimov

The key to happiness is having dreams.
The key to success is making your dreams come true.
- Anonymous

True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing.
- Socrates

Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin -
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Far from idleness being the root of all evil,
it is rather the only true good.
- Soren Kierkegaard

We censor our actions, but
our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Only those who have learned the power
of sincere and selfless contribution
experience life's deepest joy: true fulfillment.
- Tony Robbins

True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize
how little we understand about life,
ourselves, and the world around us.
- Socrates

It's not what you don't know that kills you,
it's what you know for sure that ain't true.
- Mark Twain

True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A system of morality which is based
on relative emotional values
is a mere illusion, a thoroughly vulgar conception
which has nothing sound in it and nothing true.
- Socrates

The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney

A wise man will make haste to forgive,
because he knows the true value of time,
and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain.
- Samuel Johnson

Loving, hating, having expectations:
all these are attachments.
Attachment prevents the growth of one's true being.
- Lao Tzu

Be true to thyself.
- William Shakespeare
(paraphrase of Shakespeare's famous quote)

The true sign of intelligence
is not knowledge but imagination.
- Albert Einstein

Mastering others is strength.
Mastering yourself is true power.
- Lao Tzu

'Tis strange - but true;
for truth is always strange;
Stranger than fiction.
- Lord Byron

You are never given a wish without also
being given the power to make it true.
You may have to work for it, however.
- Richard Bach

If evil be spoken of you
and it be true, correct yourself,
if it be a lie, laugh at it.
- Epictetus

Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Only one who devotes himself to a cause
with his whole strength and soul
can be a true master.
For this reason mastery demands all of a person.
- Albert Einstein

True love means putting the other person before yourself,
and honoring the relationship above all.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Knowing others is intelligence;
knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength;
mastering yourself is true power.
- Lao Tzu

Society censors our actions,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are trivial truths and there are great truths.
The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
- Niels Bohr

Knowledge is happiness, because to have knowledge -
broad, deep knowledge - is to know true ends from false,
and lofty things from low.
- Helen Keller

The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows.
- The Buddha

True happiness... is not attained
through self-gratification,
but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
- Helen Keller

In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west;
people create distinctions out of their own minds
and then believe them to be true.
- The Buddha

Know that you do not need anyone's permission
to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

"To know" is to know that you know nothing.
That is the meaning of true knowledge.
- Confucius

Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau

True love has no limits.
- Anonymous

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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie